What you will gain.

There’s more to gain from trying...whether or not you get what you want. Know that like any fear, confronting it makes it easier to push through the next time. You’ll be more resilient, wiser and better prepared for next time – and there will always a next time.

Rejection gets you closer to what you want.

The right things will always find you, but sometimes you have to fight for them. Someone or something is waiting for you. Yes you! Take the chance...this might be it. If it’s not, at least you’re a step closer to what you were looking for, and what’s looking for you. Keep going until you find it, knowing that none of what you went through will matter when you find what you were looking for.

That thing that feels like death is actually shame.

Fear of rejection stames from fear of shame. Shame exists to keep us in check, but too much of it will falter you. Shame can show up for every party – but letting it in is optional. It is an awful, heavy handed and controlling feeling, but it’s never fatal. It’s nothing you can’t deal with. It is human to experience shame so don’t let it be the demon in the dark. See it, feel it and let it in. The more you acknowledge the less control it has over you.

For how long will it matter?

Will the rejection matter tomorrow? In a week? A month? A year from now?

Don’t hesitate. Take a breath and leap.

We turn so much of life into a waiting game – waiting for the right time, the right feeling, the right ‘one’. These are all the excuses we call on to feel better about not ceasing the chance to get what we want. Waiting breathes life into fear. It is one moment, don’t prolong it. Even if things don’t go as planned you’ll be fine. You really will. There will always be risk involved in the pursit of happiness...and your joy is always worth the risk.

Trust your capacity to cope..

If you get knocked down, you’ll get back up. You’ll cope. You really will. Don’t believe your head if it tries to tell you otherwise. It’s just trying to keep you safe. You’ll always be stronger than you think you are.

What would you tell your best friend to do?

What advice would you give to someone you love? ‘Go for it,’ or ‘you’ve got this,’ – or – ‘Yeah no. Best stay safe,’ or ‘Bit risky – best not.’ It’s very possible that the advice you would give to someone else is different from what you would give yourself because when it’s someone else, you’re free from the bad feelings that come with rejection.

Talk about it

Rejection almost always gives you a good story to tell. Own it, because it’s yours – and use it to bring the best of you into full view – the positive, funny, brave, resilient parts of you that might otherwise stay hidden.

Mpirirwe J. P: NO is not as brutal as it seems. Life is full of rejection. Time and time again, you hear the brutal ‘NO’. But is it really as brutal as it seems? Although associated with negativity, there is good in rejection. If things always go your way, you loose the sense of right and wrong. Rejection should give you a chance to think through why you were told no and to fix what, if at all, you specifically did something wrong. Don’t fixate on things that will never happen. Rejection is a part of life...learn to let go.

Karungi Patience: No harm in a little escapism I’m really bad with rejection. I find myself constantly revisiting these events in my mind, at times up to months following any rejection; with many tears...and many books! I get over rejection by ignoring, or running away from it. I escape into novels and other pieces of literature until enough time has passed for a scab to form. If my life is too much for me to handle, why not live as someone else? I can’t defeat rejection, but maybe this character can ...right? It might not be the healthiest thing to do, but it works.

Angel Tanisha: A good cry can bring closure I have realized that the best way I get over rejection is by crying it out. It may not help me achieve anything specific, but I always feel a sense of closure after a good long cry. Crying is my catharsis. By embracing the sadness, I am acknowledging the rejection. Pretending nothing is wrong only ensures that my bottled up emotions will explode later. I don’t mind rejections as much as I used to. Those I have received have only made my success more valuable.

Asiima Fortunate: Self reflection and redirection Rejection may be difficult to deal with but it is part of life. Social media’s over curation of life contributes to our decreased ability to deal with hard news. We have an excess of ’false‘ positivity. I have learned to recognize that at times life does not work out; people won’t always react the way we would like them to; unplanned situations will arise. I have developed the skills to deal with rejection and now I think of such moments as opportunities instead...for self reflection and redirection.

Edmond T.O: There is more to you. . . Before you get so overwhelmed by rejection, it is important to take a step back and remember the many other things that make you special. I try to remember the things I have survived in the past; that I’m bigger than this and that there’s always a rainbow after the storm. Being rejected can really impact the way you view yourself but if you know your worth, you will go a long way..

Kasozi Mark: It’s a normal part of life. Having dealt with quite a bit of rejection, I can tell you that it doesn’t get easier. It is never ideal. You just have to get over it and try again, hoping for the best. There’s always going to be another chance. I wish someone told me this before I got kicked off the volleyball team. It was hard to move past at first, but then I went and practiced and eventually, I got back onto the team. I’ve realized that rejection is just a part of life; accepting that makes life easier to live.

Andrew Oriokot: Playing it safe keeps us safe, but it doesn’t do much more than that. Life is at the deep end, with the waves, the chaos and the unknown. Between the fear of failing and the courage to pounce is where the magic lives. It’s the boldness to live life like you own it that counts for living. The biggest threat to getting what you want is your decision to stay safe. Be proud, be brave, be fierce. Open up your heart and listen to it – it will take you to where you need to be